ode

Swim deep In silence
Inhale tears
Drown in broken love
You have me by the tip of my soul
Your hand prints are proof that you are the one that kept my heart beating
I need you.
But you cant have me.
And I want you.
But you …. Have to leave
I fell again.
Face down into my own puddle of fear
I was flying for so long
Now im dying so low..
Solo
I don’t even have me
You want to give me back
But I don’t want me… I want you
My empty hands, they grasp nothing
I have lost grip
The birds have flown
Better silence than songs
Numbness fills me..
Because your absence kills me.
Buried alive… love.
Dies.
I am a shell.
Once captivated
Now vacant.

love(sick)

my love is poison
i feel like i sucked the life out of you to bring me to life
damn.
love isnt the same because it cant be
i have to block out the thought of you
and hold my breath when you are around
selfishly i cant continue because it kills me
im suffocating
i love you
i cant help it
its cancer
im dying
there isnt a cure for this
but im going to survive
even tho i cant live
even tho i cant live
youre strong
congratulations
you broke my wall of berlin
and shredded my iron curtain
i am exposed
and i cant handle these elements
how could i nazi? (not see)
why does that matter?
the only thing that matters is everything i dont have
which means that i take for granted everything that i do
im sorry
im only human.
im love sick